Crazy and Confused . . .

Well, we leave for vacation in the morning, so you won't be hearing from me for awhile. We'll be back on the 29th. I hope everyone has a good week and don't miss me too much. I'm sure I'll have loads of pictures to share for quite some time and some stories, so you'll have something to look forward too. I'm been eager for this vacation to come. I feel like I deserve it for every thing I've gone through with the divorce and all. It'll be nice to get away for a little bit and have some fun.

Bye all. Talk to you again soon.

posted by Me @ 6:23 PM Comments: 0

What's going on? I don't like being a target when things are stressing you out. You were yelling at me over something that had no connection with us and I don't understand why. You've been acting "out of it" again and no one knows why. You're not excited about vacation. You still haven't talked to me about A like you said you were going to do. What gives? I still get the feeling that we're "falling apart" and I don't know why. You've become sort of secretive lately and in your own world. I've been doing my best to be here for you, but then I just get used as a target when things get bad. I don't like that and I don't like feeling like that. I'm getting very nervous with this vacation coming up. I know you've said you want to go, but I don't "see" that you want to go. I guess I just don't understand what the issue is lately that you're acting the way you're acting and maybe it's because you don't want to or can't talk to me about it. I just thought that we were good enough in our relationship that we could talk to each other about anything and not have to worry about being judged. I just don't see that from you anymore. I've been busting my butt to not screw up this relationship with you because I care so much about you and love you more than I thought I could ever love someone, but lately I'm not getting the same vibe from you. Maybe it's all the stress and ciaos. Maybe we do just need to go on vacation and get back to where we were before everything. I don't know. I just don't like feeling like you're hiding things or keeping things a secret from me. I'm here for you no matter what the issue is, just like you were here for me with all my ups and downs. I would hope that you wouldn't expect anything less and that you already knew that. But I don't want to continue to be an easy target when things get messy. If you don't know what's wrong or you do know what's wrong, I will be here when you're ready, but until then, I'm going to give you your space. I'm going to let you figure things out on your own. Should you decide to include me (which I hope you would), I'll be here. I care so much about you and I hate seeing you like this. I hope that vacation will relax us and bring us back into focus and bring us back "together". That is what I'm holding onto right now. A nice relaxing week.

posted by Me @ 10:01 PM Comments: 1